Last Saturday, I started to cry after finding out some not too good news. Sobbing, I related my unhappiness to some friends through sms. I was sure they will ask me if they found out from another source. I told them not to question me as then I was in no mood to explain. From the answers I received, I knew I have good friends! Someone always says "Ladies have good 6th sense". Perhaps, I knew it all along but I was too afraid or too unwilling to face it or even ask about it. This time, my heart fell, it chills and left me lost. This was a feeling which I did feel from reading books but for the first time, it really happened to me in real life.
That night, I could not sleep. From the crying I had a blocked nose but these was not the reason why I could not sleep. I tried to read to get myself into a sleepy mood but to no avail. Eventually, it took my body quite a long time to finally settle down. Woke up early the next morning, and switched on my laptop to play Facebook's games. The relevation from the previous night still haunt me and only time would tell whether it will go away. Previous night, I congratulated Someone and even wish him luck. I also told Someone that I will be sad. Guess I was being honest about it. He said we can still be friends! Either to assure him or console him, I said this is not the first time and I should be able to get over it. He told me he is glad to hear that. After surfing facebook for a while, someone came online. I started a normal conversation with him. From my perspectives, I do not want to lose a friend and which is what I am most concerned about. Maybe I am weird but Someone is still a friend that I want to keep. Only time will tell.
From this incident, I knew I have some good friends. In "Discussion with Youth", Ikeda Sensei wrote " True friendship implies a relationship where you empathize with your friends when they're suffereing and encourage them not to lose heart, and where they, in turn, empathize with you when you're in the same boat and try to cheer you up. A friendship with those qualities flows as beautifully as a pure, fresh stream." For this, I want to thank my friends for trying to cheer me up these past few days!
However as I reflected today, knowing Someone changes some of my habits. Firstly, I begin to sleep early and wake up earlier. This gives me time to do a bit more chanting, eat breakfast (which I have no habit of but is good.) and not feel so lethargic in the morning! For this, I really have to say "Thanks" (while bending my right hand to place palm on left side of chest and bows slightly) to Someone too.
Quote from Antoine de Saint-Exupery, the author of The Little Prince, " Love is not two person gazing at each other, but two people looking ahead together in the same direction".
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